I wanna wear you like a flannel shirt
Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
i ate 2 chicken nuggets and puked out 5. that doesn't even make mathematical sense
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
I wish alcohol would automatically work as birth control if you have sex drunk.
I just realized that he was my first random hookup that didnt cause a massive breakup or divorce. Im starting to grow up
Dude, the coffee is horrible this morning, Cass changed something about it
We ran out of Bailey's Irish cream...
This is what regular coffee tastes like?!?! Fuck the adult life.
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
My horseshoe mustache feels at home at this bar.
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
I pulled you and a keg around in a wagon for like five hours and apparently everyone else remembers it but us.
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
Randomize
