ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
Just found two Xanax on the floor at the tanning bed. And yes, Im taking them...looks like going to get cancer is paying off
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
Threw up 3 times on the lawn mower and then proceeded to crash it into a tree root and break it.
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
Gonna open a taco bell in colorado. Millions bro.
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
HE LEFT ME THE DAY AFTER I LET HIM PEE ON ME. If you date him after that, I'll leave the fucking PLANET.
Who died my cat blue again?
Wanna meet at the diner for breakfast? all I've eaten in the past 24 hours is glitter and penis. starvingg.
God doesn't care if you're a paramedic, you can't do that to someones cat and still get into heaven
The fact that you cheered yourself on while you puked saying it was your first college puke, blacked out, and sang taylor swift to the toilet confirms the fact that we are related. I've never been more proud.
Randomize
