hell yes lets make some ravioli
I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
You should have seen the look on the cashiers face when I was buying steel reserve with a suit on.
if she mentions anything about chili and my phone, just go with it
you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse
Just walked by a yard full of girls wearing bikinis. I did my best to stare.
I'm still not a hundred percent.. I haven't shit anything solid in two days.. I have pulled my puker muscles and I can't take deep breaths cuz of other unidentified muscles/maybe heart attack
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
Having sex with him is like yoga. I do it in the morning and then can't walk for three days afterwards.
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
It's dangerous to be this horny at work. I'm gonna stain my desk chair
Randomize
