remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
Dude, this chick, who is smokin by the way, has 4 false teeth on top from a softball accident that she can take out if she wants... Who's getting amazing head tonight? This guy!
I don't know whether to be creeped out by the fact this chick can do that, or jealous because you're getting toothless head.
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
She's currently upstairs fucking her boyfriend while I am downstairs making them a sex playlist watching her boyfriend's Weiner dog and large Boxer try and mount each other. Marvin Gaye is playing. This is the ultimate third wheel fail.
Someone left me hummas on my door step between the hours of 1am-3am
I'm just gonna yell "SURPRISE ME" and see what happens. No way this could go wrong
I think it's safe to assume that dad heard you lose your lesbian virginity last night
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
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