Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
she was so hung over that i had to hold her hair while she puked in a trash can in the middle of the student center as new freshman and their parents walked by.
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
She just invited me to drunkenly make out on the kitchen floor again.....
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
Bring me the dick of your room mate Alex and I will reward you in in skittles.
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
almost just sent your mom a dick pic. almost.
Hey before you quit, let me sell drugs to your boss at least one more time
Some guy just walked past the bus stop in a lab coat and with a samurai sword and case...
dude. I can hear the air.
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
Neighbor just came over and asked if I had anything to clean blood out of carpet... it's definitely time to move.
Randomize
