Britney fell asleep on the couch in the foier, got up stripped then pissed on the floor. Then got dressed and went to sleep in it. Also downstairs toilet clogged. Not me. I will be gone by the time you get home from work. Have fun.
can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
Remember when I was so high that I thought my appendix burst? All I had to do was fart man, just fart.
Don't you realize there's more to life than sex and pizza rolls?
I am pretty sure they consider me one of the "bros". They compliment girl's racks to me and are the human forms of dick-be-gone. They won't sleep with me more than once cause it's "weird", or let any "untrustworthy boys" sleep with me and I still help them get laid. Not...fair...
Puking on the side of the road and legitimately just got a head nod and thumbs up from an 80 year old man on a Segway... What the fuck?
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
Ok well i was gonna say you can only borrow my fog machine if you will use it to emerge from your room in a cloud of smoke after having sex with sarah, so yeah we're good
I just watched my ex butt chug a quart of eggnog. Why did I dump her again?
He's gone. He left a note but all it says is "Dear Neil" followed by a drawing of a hand flipping the bird in the direction of a butt.
I think people are normalizing furries
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
Randomize
