took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
I swear I only do things like fuck 19 yr olds just to hear how you laugh when I tell you.
You know its a good sign when a girl asks who everyone is AFTER she flashes her tits to the room.
If I were there, I'd be putting a martini in you, via funnel if need be, and you would be doing this thing.
I'm going to tattoo a maze on my back for the next fucker that tries to blow early ....
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
Party Liz is going to have to have her wings clipped until someone gets me some baby reins to wear
Responsible roommate: 1. Someone who takes a huge shit at work so as not to clog the toilet at home.
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
I also slapped not one but two bananas on the ass, twerked in public, and I think I made out with someone
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
Was last night real life? Like did you really light your hair on fire
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