I want to snug with you.
You want my snuggie?
when you find your car can you pick me up? his mom is here and im hungover
last night i found out that my 11 year old cousin used me as an example of what not to do in her D.A.R.E. speech. awesome.
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
Why did I see a weird snapchat of you barking at McDonald's last night?
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
They ran out of toilet paper so I used the rug to wipe my vagina
Dude I think the cat just licked the coke plate
Nate is still in lock up because when the cop informed me he'd shit his pants in the squad car I declined to post bail.
I wiped my ass with a McDonalds wrapper. I've hit an all time low. Sorry for my impatience
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