I just saw a woman parallel park a horse. Awesome. Only in New York..
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
Btw before you ask, the dr said there's no way shoving his dick that far down my throat is why i got laryngitis
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
I just got my beard fondled by a drunk chick outside the venue. I feel slightly violated. And I think her boyfriend wanted to fight me.
I'm like an air traffic controller of women. It's a very similar job. Well spaced and gentle landings are good. When they meet, it's bad. Explosions bad. Dying screaming burning children bad.
My brother and I have had one conversation in the past like 3 weeks and it was about what it would be like as a sentient butt plug
I also told the pizza delivery guy that he smelled good. I must be ovulating.
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
So when did "Are you okay?" translate into "Don't tell me you got fucked by another rando after another rager"?
I had to explain to the doctor why I'm peeing blood. He still didn't believe a girl would have that much sex... You could feel the judgement forming in the room when I went into the details...
Damn, well a girls gotta get laid too
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
Randomize
