i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
it feels like theres a golf ball between my legs. the sex was totally worth it tho.
it was like having sex with a tree stump
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
Just found a hole in my wall with your left shoe in it.
This morning two of his housemate threw confetti over me, started singing and handed me a make shift trophy out of cereal boxes and beer cans that said 'Harry's Virginity' on it. Fucking brilliant!
She made a roadhead CD. Can I marry her?
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
I got you a "sorry you think I'm pregnant" present
You leaned over to me in the elevator and whispered "how long do I have to pretend to be sober?"
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
What's the blow job-backrub exchange rate these days? I've got some killer stress knots
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