I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
on toilet. in drag. drinking coffee vodka. I regret nothing.
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
I think it says something about my life when I start picking up girls while im in rehab. And I don't think it's good.
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
I never thought I would have to get vodka suctioned out of my ear
I'm such a good drunk match marker. You single, you single... Drunk friend meet single boy. BOOM illegitimate baby made!
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
It's like we're in an emotionally distant three-way and there's not even sex to show for it.
I need to stop challenging people to taking off clothes. I win too often
God help them if any millennials are in the vicinity. Rent is too high and we no longer fear death
Randomize
