too bad you live with your parents still
The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
This frat boy drinking a forty and wearing a pussy patrol shirt just ran out in front of my car. I should have used less brakes.
If I die tonight, I want you to know that your sister is awesome in bed
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
I love how kegs are figured into our monthly bills
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
I got a blowjob dressed with a t shirt sweatpants and a Fanny pack. Not kidding.
Please tell me you have Advil or Tylenol or ibuprofen or a fucking baseball bat
Well, we broke up and instead of putting my shit out on the curb like a normal person, she fucking donated everything to Goodwill. So now I have to pay two dollars for one of my own t shirts.
Well, I watched a girl proposition a shit ton of people, try to take a cocktail waitresses job and then proceed to walk into a wall. Damn, I'm a little jealous.
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
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