SEEEEXXX PLEASE
Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
First drunken handjob: not successful. Second handjob, mostly sober: much better. Nightly news brought to you by me.
Are you asking me on a date where we get shithoused and do some fingerpainting?
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
to instagram or to not instagram the picture i took of when i shit in the urinal
Ps you missed quite a show. I was for some reason whipping my hair back and forth and head butted the tip jar. It shattered and now I have a circular bruise on my forehead. All the bartenders hit the floor to get all the quarters.
Successful first night. Lost my phone. Front desk found it. Earthquake in wine country. Didn't feel it.
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
He walked upstairs in nothing but his boxers and drunkenly asked my brother for a condom....so much for a good first impression.
You'd think that a rotation of two 30 year old men could keep me satisfied... WHY ISN'T THERE A MAN THAT CAN KEEP UP WITH MY HEALTHY SEXUAL APPETITE?!
Randomize
