I decided it would be a good time to smoke on one of my deliveries but then I got the munchies and ate a piece of the pizza I was freaking out so I told him it was our new pacman pizza
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
Why is there broken glass in my purse?
You stole a snow globe. From your VP. Soooo...maybe don't put all your hopes on that promotion you were expecting
Just copped mushrooms from a dude in a business suit. U comin or what?
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
i tried giving myself a bikini wax.1. i hate you 2. i think i'm dying
See, this is why you don't do nice things for people. You'll get stuck in the snow and you won't catch a dick.
Did you smoke and go to the aquarium again?
Want ramen today?
I need a salad
SALAD DOESNT WARM YOUR HEART AND BELLY
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