I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
fuck off i hope your children turn out to be republicans
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
Cleaning my room at 2am, in just one corner I found six beers, half a pint of whiskey, my flask, 2 shotgun bullets, my crown and shimmer lotion.
That was awkward , having sex with her while her husband watched via Skype. I'm a porn star or a target. Idk
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
My Easter dress smells like alcohol, men, and bad decisions
My mom and my boss just had a discussion on FB about the sexual habits of old people. The magic of the Internet.
so I just realized.. of my 70k student loan debt, most of it went toward bar tabs, eightballs, and sweet-ass ties to wear to gamedays and other people's weddings. I think about shit like this while I'm at my mid-level management position. you know. "working."
Look upon your future, America, and despair.
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
Randomize