Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
my friend just told me "I dunno what u r doing but keep doing it cuz it makes u look fabulous"
LOL that's cool. Guess u r gonna have to keep doing me
you better believe me or I'll punch you in the face
I don't know who the girl crying at my kitchen table eating gravy from the KFC container is, but I feel like she could be my soulmate
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
He just walked up to me in the kitchen, pulled out his penis and stuck it in my sweatpants pocket.
It was probably cold. Sweatpants pockets are notoriously warm.
Hurry there's four guys dressed up as a bachelorette party, one has a condom veil and the rest are selling candy bouquets and asking if anyone wants to get laid for $5
I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
dude, i just found out morgan freeman loves weed. all my moms arguments are now irrelevant
I'm glad you still love me even when I change pants in the kitchen and demand you spoon me
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
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