I would like to feed your fingertips to the wolverines.
Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
remind me to tell you about the ham sandwich empire im building
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
unrelatedly i think im gonna download boogie nights just to see mark wahlberg's penis
I asked her if she wanted to make this a permanent exclusive thing instead of a fuck buddy thing, and she just looked at me like I'm an idiot.
That's because you are an idiot.
He sent me $300 worth of sex toys. My clitoris went into hiding after two days.
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
I swear she hasnt shaved since the last time we hooked up 5 months ago
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
Oh okay well are you handling the "just sex part" like a professional hooker like I taught you?
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
I texted him back and I am so nervous I may vomit up all of the soup I just ate.
Randomize