Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
Get this. Chipped my front tooth taking a sip of a gay mans beer out of my cleavage. Fuck my fucking life. that'll be fun to explain to my dentist
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
So I'm at the VFW tonight and the shot special here is straight 151 for 2 dollars. They must hate our livers
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
I just want him to get into an accident where he's horribly disfigured but otherwise fine so he's not so freaking handsome
you told me you wanted to be a soccer mom with a high tolerance then you put the bottle to your face
Have you ever wondered if we are just made up characters in someone's head? You'll have to forgive me right now I think I have 7 thumbs
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