how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
there is no excuse for him not showing up to my st. patrick's day party. i touch his dick. i get him on the high holidays.
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
Alright dude i'm gonna go to go sleep off this soberness. my life is a cosmic joke
He kept stopping sex to whisper in my ear, and the only thing I could understand was "double stuffed oreos"
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
Dude are you wearing a trashbag right now?....
I seemed to have misplaced my pants...
Probably for the best. My morning wood is pretty horrible. I wouldn't want to tip the earth's axis/ create a new magnetic pole
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
Did you smoke and go to the aquarium again?
I've never seen anyone as high as you were.. you collapsed onto the kitchen floor hugging a tub of ice cream. You named it phil.
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
Randomize
