it sounded like he was fisting a can of crisco.
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
the first call I got in the morning was from visa fraud prevention so yeah it was one of those nights
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
Trying to figure out if I'm the second dude she hooked up with yesterday. I feel like a consolation prize
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
He asked me if the reason I slept around is because I grew up in a broken home. I am so done fucking Christians.
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
He asked her to marry him and she said yes. There is NO WAY she knows about his penchant for wearing lingerie.
She shoved a hot dog in my pocket and started grinding on it.
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
also, my mom just called to make sure the dick tattoo on your arm was fake..
Judging from the sharpie on my face, glitter on my chest and women's tiger print panties i'm wearing last night was a thing.
Randomize
