And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
Our hot neighbor just came over and asked for a toilet plunger...not so hot anymore
"Take a picture of me motorboating molly" was probably not my best career move
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
If blow jobs were a super power she'd be in the Justice League.
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
I was too lazy to get my chapstick out of my purse so i lubed up my lips with pizza grease. On a scale of 1-10 how embarassed should i be?
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
Randomize
