Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
There's a dead frog in my kitchen?
Yeah, you found him outside and decided to give him a bath with your roommates electric toothbrush.
The worst part is that you sang Air Supply songs to him as you did it. Poor guy died in the middle of "Making love out of nothing at all"
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
He just asked for the blowjob I promised him 3 years ago that he'd get the next time Michigan beat Ohio State. Goddamnit.
The bellhop gave us weed in our keycard envelop. We went down to tip him and he apparently never gets that so he just gave us more weed. Kentucky is strange
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
Did I leave the house with out a shirt or socks?
Yea, you said you didn't need them cause she was going to take them off anyways and that it would "save time".
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
I'm kinda glad you won't be in Vegas tomorrow because you'd make us go streaking or throw dead animals at them.
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
I'm just glad you didn't end up in Staten Island
I woke up naked holding a taco. My ass couldn't even make it to my bed let alone Staten Island
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
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