WAKE UP. GET ME THE PILL. AND SAVE MY LIFE
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
i woke up with a shattered plate next to my head.
Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
You put me in such a good mood with that road head, I bought everyone at Hooters donuts.
Until you have had Country Grammar stuck in your head whilst writing a Supreme Court brief you've never lived.
BILL GATES DONALD TRUMP LET ME IN NOW
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
Apparently I handcuffed myself to the dishwasher...
It’s like my vagina just knows when a man is a barrel-chested freedom fighter.
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