I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
We raised our shot glasses and you screamed out "TO MY DAD FINALLY GOING TO REHAB!"
mallory made a planned parenthood decision maker flow chart again.
Last night: Repeatedly yelled about how the fishbowl tasted like blue, stole a stranger's hat, hugged the DJ for playing my request, made out with my roommate, and abandoned the guy I dragged to the club in the first place
This morning: Hat doesn't fit, hangover headache is blue, and I can't move without getting lightheaded
Listen when they tell you not to drink after giving blood
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
Yeah. Let's save our goodbyes for when I'm obnoxiously and embarrassingly drunk and more than likely naked.
Tiny.
I mean tony. It's like autocorrect knows he wasn't well endowed.
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
Looking for my adderal, only found acid. What a shame
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
Randomize
