I would never have sex with Danny Devito!! JSYK.
It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
Times like this, when you talk openly about Tinkerbell being your spirit animal, are times when I'm allowed to question your sexuality.
I have no idea why I said that. I have no idea why anything happened last night, I broke my toaster making a egg. I'm going to quit drinking.
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
I'm surprised, it's been so long you must be starving
At a certain point, the zombie-like hunger goes away. Then the sadness sets in. Then you start lying to yourself that you're taking some "me time." Then you remember you dodged chlamydia and Buddha knows what else. Then you're at peace with it.
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
He played me Kanye.. Speaking my love language.. He got a well deserved BJ
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
Randomize
