Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
There is no way I'm taking advice from somone who's idea of a balanced diet consists of vodka and lemon detox juice
At least I'm fat on the outside. You can NEVER change being fat on the inside.
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
THE VODKA TRAIN IS NOW PULLING INTO THE STATION
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
So drunk I thought the door was feeling me up for a seconds
So yeah, turns out I enjoy vaguely public group sex. Who knew?
I know you've been in hospital with meningitis, but last night I walked into a streetlight and bruised my penis so who's really suffering here
Hey, sorry I choked you last night... I was just really excited to see you.
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