Christians are straight up FREAKS
Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
I wish you could order shots online.
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
Im sweating champagne and woke up in nothing but a tuxedo jacket. What didnt go wrong last night?
Dude, you walked in on me 5 times each times you had a different person with you. And each time you lifted the covers up and said 'whats going on in here'
We found her naked passed out on the bathroom floor. She didn't even make it to the shower. She was clutching the bathroom rug.
On a lighter note, my mom and I were playing scattergories, and for "things that you keep hidden" we both put dildo. Proof that we really are related.
The bachelorette started when I opened the door and they threw a few dozen dildos at me.
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
You know I've done a lot of messed up stuff. But I never thought I would have to put a bandaid on my dick. Yet here we are.
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
I can barely operate my hands; what makes you think I can operate my dick
Randomize
