it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
I just woke up in bed, rolled over, and found a whole pizza.
this is the second day in a row.
Oh. Yeah. It's the same pizza then.
I was walking around the party holding a dog on my shoulder like it was a parrot
I am walking funny today. And it's sad because it's from the bad encounter with the sidewalk rather than a good encounter with a stripper
My ninety day supply of adderal just came in the mail and I literally just dumped all 180 pills into my hands and laughed like a maniac. Shits about to get cray
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
He had all the grace of a fucking hippo and the emotional control of a five year old
Stay calm. It's a titty bar. A ring of cocaine will protect you.
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
Randomize
