I need help removing her.
I saw two morbidly obese women get winded after fighting over the last motorized wheelchair at Walmart
These are the moments in life you observe a force greater than us at work
You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
woke up with 15 BAGS of hot dog buns in my passenger seat... jameson strikes again
its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
Just remembered to take my BC at the liquor store. Just swallowed it with a free sample of Whiskey.
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
What's a good pandora station to masturbate to?
I've been buying my puppy dildos for chew toys. I can't wait till a girl comes over and my dog is gnawing on a giant black cock
Like for real, is your junk ok? I have to look after my investments.
Came back with a random sweatshirt, an American flag, and a for sale sign. Mission success?
I have so many plans for this weekend and sobriety is not invited.
Come over. And we'll put iced coffee in the bong.
Randomize
