So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
ha. weirdest feeling ever. just wiped my ass with my non-dominant hand. (eating cheeseburger with right one)
Your grandmother is in heaven weeping.
i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
my favorite part of the night was when I was in the bathroom frantically trying to get my cat whiskers and nose off to make hooking up less awkward
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
But seriously who drew a dick on a tortilla and nailed it to the door?
Ever the responsible adult, I just realized that today is the Obamacare deadline, but I'm too high to handle insurance now.
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
I have a hook up buddy in Abiquiu. He lives next to a Chipotle; that's the only reason I see him.
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
Randomize
