One girl and one boy is just not enough.
i woke up to her playing with my penis. just wiggling it around and around. awkward night? i would say so.
I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
just so you know... i was wasted last night, but the evening is coming back to me in flashes... i made you eat gravy last night, didn't i?
i feel like words won't express my appreciation properly so at some point i'm just going to bring you pizza then go down on you for an hour. fair?
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
Boys that pee in my bed don't get happy birthday wallposts on facebook
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
She pulled out a water gun filled with vodka and called it her weapon of choice tonight. She's fine.
Randomize
