He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
I listened to the last 10 minutes of that 20 minute voicemail, it's solid gold. At one point he literally suggests we buy tasers and go around shooting people.
So the bartender just told me that there was numerous people who saw me having sex on the rooftop last weekend. +1
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
I've slowly been stuffing french fries down his pants. I'm at 31 and he hasn't even noticed.
I swear there's a gravitational pull from your vagina to large groups of men in uniform.
Like fighting the continuous urge to sing Neil diamond "coming to America" kinda fucked up right now
Please tell me you werent the one who replaced every beer bottle in my fridge with a picture of a baby kitten.
... and if i was..
Fuck. You.
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
I walked a mile in this weather wearing nothing but a toga. Zero fucks. Your move Mother Nature.
Had to walk of shame past Westminster Abbey this morning. Pretty sure a Japanese tourist took a photo of me.
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
Why is everyone judging me for telling the cat a bedtime story?
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
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