No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
Dude, just discovered frito and mozzarella nachos. Don't say I never contributed anything to this world.
Two grown ass men just come into the bar riding humongous tricyles
Thank you for calling me on to a higher level of debauchery. fuck anyone who says we aren't good for each other
My last 2 google image searches were 'a lot of pudding' followed by 'a generous portion of pudding'
You're the horniest male I have ever encountered
Makes it sound like you're a scientist documenting your discoveries. I warned you.
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
He said did you just interrupt me midsentence to admire another man's penis?
I didn't know how to commemorate his death, so I snorted a fat line off of his obituary. Rest in peace.
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
I made her pull the car over 5 times to puke because she was going to fast, apparently she was only going 30mph...
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
I'm gonna invite every single tinder date I've had to my birthday. Let them fight, battle Royale style. The winner gets to fuck me. \n\nBest. Birthday. Ever
Randomize
