I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
I just saw a homeless man dressed as a pirate. I love san francisco.
I swallowed and made him pancakes in the morning. I feel almost as desperate as Jennifer Aniston at this point.
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
Soo I have a handle of 100 proof captain, cupcakes, and nothing to get up for in the morning.. This blizzard is shaping up to be a great night.
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
Found a beard hair in my crotch.... care to explain?
I'm gonna have to flying elbow somebody tonight in memory of Macho Man
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
Damn, it's been so long since I had sex I could use the cobwebs from my vagina to decorate for Halloween.
Well, now that you have a gf, its gonna be awkward when I get drunk and make out with you..... Then later, pretend like I don't remember.
Also, I've found a new way to get drunk at work for free. Everytime I make a bushwhacker and there's extra... I put it in a cup. Its the Never ending drink.
I think the closest to heaven you can get in this world is your morning dump after a night of Molly
I was living a snoop dogg song I fucked her on the floor so I wouldn't mess up my bed
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
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