you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
Bad news. Pictures just stimulated my memory and i just realized the stripper I hooked up with this weekend tasted like pizza.
I told her she can't come to our bonfire because she throws up on herself & she has a mustache. And now apparently I'm a bitch or something.
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
Got some good news and bad news about the hayride this weekend.
The good news is its still on, the bad news is we don't have any hay. The best news, if you drink enough you won't give a fuck that its just a trailer.
if all that ever happens for the rest of forever is drinking wine and eating popcorn, ill be okay
I thought it was my alarm clock, turns out it was her vibrator still going off on the side of my face.
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
Randomize