so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
You burnt your salmon and tried to mail it. Post marked to: Starving Kid in Africa
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
He felt like a one man threesome
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
Also what is the name of Americas thing where we had a holy obligation to expand westward? I'm going name my new lighter that.
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
If you have shit your pants within the past two years, please take a seat.
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
Are you good with a knife? I need someone to perform amateur surgery.
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
lost my vibrator and now I have to masturbate manually. The struggle is fucking real.
I swear to god if I have to repeat this to you one more mother fucking time I will flip fucking shit and acidic rain will pour down upon your mother fucking soul
Randomize
