yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
I think the recipie for awesome sauce is butter and semen
Drunk off five beers on a Tuesday. I'm not sure which part of that statement is more sad
Give him a trash can and a welcome home balloon, he will be good.
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
I'm on acid right now in three feet of snow. I NEEEED YOOOOUUUU
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
I rode home in a shopping cart so there's that. MVP to the guy that pushed it.
What're you gonna do with the rest of your night?
Probably watching cooking videos and fantasizing about pie
We were on the beach when you spilled sand in the bottle and said "relax it's vodka, it'll disinfect itself"
Every day I wake up and there is no spectacular morning wood waiting for me I get so sad.
As I walked across the lawn after the party got busted, an officer told me to chug my beer before I left the premises.
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize
