I tried to pay my bar tab with my gym membership card. Twice.
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
I just ate a whole bag of celery instead of getting up to get a glass of water. That high.
you rearended a car with your bike and then puked all over his back windshield. They made BUI's for you.
She is trying to turtle bite me and when I pull away she says just let it happen. Then she pulled a poptart out of nowhere
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
PUB CRAWL IS THE WEEK I COME BACK FROM NOLA OMG OMG OMG. Has it been a year already since I tried to make out with you and you let a bar tender take a shot out of your cleavage? Time flies.
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
Worst walk of shame man. They had a fire drill at 7am, had to walk out of her all girl dorm wearing my Everday I'm Hustling sweater
You're finding a boat, I'm going to sleep with a guy that lives above a bar and has 24 hour access. We are really nailing this adulting thing
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
The last person that asked me out got pushed down an escalator
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