best thing about halloween? there are pumpkins to puke in EVERYWHERE!
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
I came home drunk to my night light on and a Hershey's bar on my bed. Mom knows me too well.
Just beat 2 Norwegian women in beer pong. Never been so proud to be an American.
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
There are people taking shots out of a turtle shell.
First night sober since New Years. I'm not sure what hurts more, the hangover or the credit dread when I find out what the tickets to Bali actually cost.
You stole a fry from a complete stranger. He wasn't happy. Then you said fuck it and stole the whole poutine and ran down the street while he stared in shock.
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
Also I just took the BEST ass selfie of my adult life.... it's gonna be a good day haha
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
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