I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
I keep reminding myself that my vagina isn't a homeless shelter.
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
It wasn't the stripper that gave you the hickey but I just figured out who did
Yeah... I was considering changing that part but the boxed wine is non-negotiable.
My parents are takin me for chinese food for my 4/20 present.
I fucking hate you.
think he just told me if I need to shit I should go outside.
It has been so long since I got any action that I have decided to change my vagina's name from "the chamber of judgement" to "the cave of forgotten dreams".
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
I don't think he understands that his kid doesn't bother me. I have a binder full of developmentally appropriate early childhood activities.
Either go for divorced men who are forty plus or stop doing this immediately. You are 23 years old. You need more wine and less baby fever
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
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