can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
I read the police report. You asked the cop if you could use his in-car computer to update your facebook. No way you get out of a DUI.
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
I don't even know how sober sex starts anymore
my mom just called and warned me someone is trying to serve me, i feel like i'm playing an extreme game of hide and go seek these next weeks
I want to fuck you with a popsicle till it melts then eat it out of you
Really.
I answered the my mom's phone call about what we're doing for father's day while he was still fucking me. She thought I seemed really excited about his hiking boots present.
you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
I went to pick my brother up downtown and I stopped at a red light a homeless old man comes up knocks on the window shows me his penis and then screams money
Tonight I celebrated marriage equality by letting a girl I don't know kiss me at the club.
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
If I get one more "oh yaaaaa he changed your oil" texts, I'm gonna lose my shit
I will be DAMNED if anyone but me breastfeeds my cat.
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