sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
i just used a urinal to avoid climbing stairs, i need to quit drinking.
i really thought "pants-shitting drunk" was an unreachable level until last night
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
Next thing I know we're all standing in the kitchen holding hands and thanking God for the beer.
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
Can one of you do me a favor? Light a match and throw it into my room. Bc I'm certain I would rather be burned to death than live in this hell I call my life
I'm going for high school drunk, you've got 15 minutes to get here.
It's going to be weird as hell when you have kids. I'll meet them and think "Hi, Did you know that I was almost your dad?"
Ugh. I'm going to die alone, sister. Half-eaten by one of my thirty-seven cats and clutching a martini shaker
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
Of two things I'm absolutely sure: 1. I only took 2 hits off that joint and 2. I definitely ran over hedwig on the way home
Dude, fuck these noisy kids, fuck all this light, and fuck you for getting to sleep while I have to be productive and hungover.
Randomize
