I think im going to throw up on grandma
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
One step ahead. Always. Roses are red, violets are blue... I'm gonna fuck you with a rake.
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
What has my life become? I'be officially recruited my fuck buddy for help getting my ex back.
Its okay. I just know how you can text with your hands cuffed behind you back, so I had no idea what "oh shit" meant.
Babe, I'm gunna be straight with you. When you act like a dick it makes me regret not fucking my manager last week.
I'm going to tell you something and I want no judgement because it's america day and I'm wearing an American flag bathing suit but...I woke up in a yard.
the girl who hid my weed when the cops came has a birthday coming up. i feel like i should get her something.
Guess it's not a good idea to try lighting a cigarette with my stove drunk, I burnt off half my bangs.
Randomize
