I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops
You didn't want to have sex last night because you said your grandpa just died and you didn't want him watching..
I love you. Thanks for all the blowjobs.
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
Good news. Isn't krabs. Bad news. Not sure what it is. Worse news. Encouraged not to fuck till known. Great news getting laid tonight
Also- bikini mowing was a horrible idea. One truck just drove by 3 times, turning around at the end of the block each time. My tan may be better for it but my conscience has been raped.
Where did this racoon skin hat, stop sign and bag full of tacos come from?
Narnia or $5 pitcher night either way
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
So is the trick to long distance communication to be drunk during phone conversations?
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
You wrapped yourself in tin-foil and told us you were Iron Man. I have pictures.
I’ve jerked off three times and taken five shits already today. Being hung over in your 40’s is a fucking roller coaster.
Randomize
