dinner at cheesecake factory: $40. drinks at yard house: $50. having sex in the VG parking lot while people are staring at you awkwardly: priceless. Goodnight.
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
I have to brush my teeth today to feel like I did something.
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
i don't think they understood the house was collapsing. they kept dancing and jumping and asking for more cups.
I ended up naked with smirnoff caps on my nipples. Dignity is now a completely foreign concept to me.
My nipple piercings are like the guardrails, that's why they feel so safe.
LOVE ME MORE THAN PIZZA CAN
So now I'm lying here in bed taking notes from Teen Mom... I fucked up
I was angry that a college kid had a new Audi
so I peed on it
Not my lover. I would rather lose all my teeth, and I fucking love my teeth.
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
Taking a walk while tripping face during Halloween time was a bad idea. I started crying bc I was so scared and hide in the parks playground.
I just found an entire bag of French fries under the seat of my car labeled "For emergency use only" drunk me is always planning ahead.
Randomize
