Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
Could you please tell them to stop whispering "thundercunt" every time I walk in the room?
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
Did I crawl through the hotel lobby all the way to our room?
My "Week Of Not Checking Into OK Cupid So I Don't Hook Up With Another Fat Chick" lasted four hours. On the plus side, she was the smallest one yet.
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
They sent me to the hospital. Apparently, of the many things I said, I looked at the doctor and told him, "Wow... it's like you're a REAL DOCTOR!"
Just warning you the last time I had captain Morgan I gave a blow job to a guy that looked like Jesus.
IF I CAN STICK YOUR DICK IN MY MOUTH, I CAN STICK MY GUM ON YOUR NIGHTSTAND.
Sad fact: I'm doing that thing where I'm bored so I give myself Princess Leia hair and drink alcohol.
Well I woke up at my house so that's a plus. But I'm pretty sure I peed on my sofa because I woke up in the pee position.
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
The true debate: do I prioritize going to bed and getting more than six hours of sleep or do I prioritize washing out various grease, leaf bits, and jizz out of my hair
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
Randomize
