I just five second ruled a donut I dropped at starbucks, everyones staring
I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
There's jack Daniels coming out of my eyes instead of tears.
All I want to do is shower, but there is a keg in there.
I have just found the cubicle of sustenance. And I will rejoice at all the families that have not found this magic. This vodka cubicle of magic.
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
We took your mom out drinking and we wound up winning 18 games of Flip Cup. You have amazing genetics.
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
Randomize
