he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
Okay, we really need to start training for the St Pattys parade. 48 hours of green beer won't end well if we don't prep ourselves. 2 week bender starts now
I'm really sorry I gave you road head last night and made you drive over and break the sprinkler system.
woke up wearing a canadian flag with the starting forward of the hockey team. i feel oddly patriotic
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
I used my yoga mat as a door stop so he couldn't come into my room when i was sleeping last night. Drunk engineering at its finest
Doors open. I'm laying in bed watching caddy shack and drinking a vodka tonic.
And I'm out of vodka so bring vodka or 2013 will blow ass
Made eye contact with a friendly neighborhood dog walker while violently puking out the window. How's your Wednesday going?
When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down.
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
In my drunk state I was like I ONLY HAD SEX WITH SOMEONE ELSE BECAUSE HE WAS THE HOTTEST GUY IVE EVER EVEN SEEN
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
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