Do you know how hard it is to masturbate with a runny nose?
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
Girl walking by was talking on the phone about how he needed to write a gratitude list in her letter to god this week. Too stoned
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
If we're single and alone together, the fuck angels shall sing upon our nude bodies.
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
If you need anything just hit me up
Pancakes
Noted.
why does drunk me think that doing things like throwing up on my desk and all over my 15 page lab report is okay
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
Randomize
