From the crime scene it appears that I attempted to throw up into a candle.
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
im just gonna turn drinking alone on new years into a tradition
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
He gave me his number and said the usual call whenever you need someone but then was like... or just call me.
You would pick up a guy in AA.
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
The tequila covers up the fact that the choco liquor tastes like sadness.
A guy just grabbed my balls before he shook my hand because he thought he knew me.
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
Well I'm over here squandering a fabulous hair day and radiant complexion
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
Randomize
