The midget we rented got so drunk last night he got carted off in an ambulance
I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
Either I get my picture taken sitting on a fuckin pony, or I'm not coming.
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
wow, you never really realize how many muscles you have in your crotch until you pull them all.
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
Ask her if it hurt when she broke through earths crust as she ascended from hell
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
Plus we had to have sex before the game because there is a good chance we won’t be speaking for the rest of the week. #ironbowl
You can’t judge a dick by its balls.
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
Randomize
